dave what are you into



if you look up sophistication and grace in the dictionary you will see this picture of me drinking week old hot mountain dew from a 2 dollar champagne glass from the dollar tree.


Well who would I be to deny you that?

This is me whistling, majestically, not at all unlike a modern-day cat caller.

a rude person rose
and youre not one of those people
i know youre a good person
youve got a good heart and you mean well
which is why you vaguely resemble a cat caller


I am not in denial!!!!

not the vibe im getting here


Jakes are amazing cute! All of them!
And so are the Daves that you claim do not exist. 

…Except that one wanker. 

We do not speak of him, however. 

Well, your sidebar has you wearing shades so?? Maybe you wear them so much it’s not as bright to you.

i dont know man
ill have to see it for myself before i like
make an accurate statement towards their varying levels of attractiveness
i am fine as hell though the other impostors probably are too

the one wanker
got it

not sure which wanker im avoiding bringing up but hey man
if it ruffles your feathers im not going to be the one to push the subject
my lips are sealed

yeah yeah it does
my eyes are way too sensitive for their own damn good
need protective covering in style to properly protect them
so youre right thats probably it

the roof is not my son


but i will raise it


It’s less of unexpected turn when you realize I am part hyena and therefore, part nocturnal. 

Now it makes sense.

this is the shyamalan twist ive been waiting for
i mean yeah it totally makes sense but then again
most people dont go hunting at either variant of that time so



youre just in denial


We s)(ould definitely bring t)(at one into t)(e equation because it still counts!!!!!!

nah son
thats a role
a character not steve
we cant blemish his rep because his character couldnt get lucky
that man was probably getting lucky while filming that
he pisses excellence